2more to go.
just TWO more.
the papers had been killer.
i thought i'd at least survive thru GP to boost up my morale for the rest of my papers.
but NOOOO...
the chiefs (up there) decided to make this harmless paper into an ultimate killer paper.
its like being a 7 year old sitting for an advanced Ancient Greek paper.
i do not understand a single word.
that was the worse GP paper.
& moreover, i was totally in no mood to sit for a paper in the wee hours of monday morning.
bummer.
2 words to describe the rest of the papers:
MAJOR HEARTACHE.

asdashlkjlasdlkjasd;ajljds;aks.
& i just lost 28marks JUST-LIKE-THAT.
BUMMER!!!!!!!!!

ok. past few days/week snaps.

kucing tersayangku... look at her adorable blue eyes. i want blue eyes too lahh.

first off,
EPPY BURSTDAY AIDAH LALING!!!!
& to you too, GOOGLE.
hah.
love you to megabits (:
study was ok today.
no paper.
went NLB with darls.
we went to the 10th storey courtyard.
& the sign outside the door said, "BEWARE OF FALLING COCONUTS"
-guffaws-
but the scenery was great.
thn halfway studying, the weather went bad.
& it poured. booos.
ive been having WEIRD cravings.
like reaaaally absurd ones.
today, i craved for cakes & yoghurt.
& ive got a new online pet!
its very cute.
i lost my ducky named JELLYFISH.
& my pet terrapin named GREEN ran away. (or rather, crawled away)
so i adopted... JELLYFISH JR!
YEY!
oh, btw, i spent some time aft studies to scavage for my cravings.
& i decided to forgo my cake.
& got DANISHES instead! 4 of them!
& of cos, my yummilicious yoghurt.
but its low-fat. booooos.
nvm, cant wait to savour them later.

i still love you, dont you know?
dont leave me just because im bad.
my life;s in a turmoil, baby.

for the love of God, please, let me pass my promos & sunday exams.
i admit, i havent been a good girl.
but, prayers work miracles.
& i need that miracle badly.
my self-esteem had been very low these days.
please..
_____________
yesterday's mugging session was disappointing.
isk got tired & distracted.
& i was feeling guilty for accompanying him for his haircut.
i wanted to mug somemore.
but i cannot say no to him.
not that he forced me.
but i dont know how to say no to him.
played on the swings for awhile with him after his cut.
i punctured my hand while pushing him.
stupid collar pin.
& when its his turn to push me, he took revenge by twisting the swing & "anyhow pushing" me.
i got so scared that i'll fall off the swing.
& i cried
period.
im sucha bummer.
haiz.
moodswing's here to stay, darling.

just came home from mugging.
i am flushed & utterly shagged.
& my back is killing me!
ached so much from all the muggings.
urghhhh.
totally waste of time in skl today.
like seriously.
only 9 out of 18 came.
i was so so so soooooo bored.
but nvm, at least i managed to cook pasta for booboo & me.
last time before fasting.
aiyo.
hug hug & kiss kiss puas puas ok?
later fasting cannot hanky panky.
lol.

& thanks for spending time with me today.
that arm around my waist.
that feeling.
that warmth.
hope the pasta tasted great junnow.
you were totally digging in lah.
thanks for appreciating my cookings (although you still REFUSE to forget about my first attempt to cook kway teow for you & it turned too oily & salty.)

rachel mo was like letting us listen to this very high db ringtone which she claims adult cant hear.
its very annoying. cos its like a huge mosquito buzzing IN your ear. not AT.
all of us can hear.
thn fad asked Mr Security guard if he can hear anything whn they played that ringtone but he said he cant.
zomg.
i wouldnt believe it initally but then.. haha..
& i came up with the conclusion that the ringtone help us determine the signs of aging.
so we tried it on Mr Az & Mr Ram.
they can hear laaa...
that means theyre not old YET.

& yey! i got isk addicted to another song.
kudos to me!

RANDOM SNAPSHOTS!


baby eeyore!

fad's bday pressie from me. DAMN CUTE RIGHT! it reminded me of B&J's (:

you wanna go fishing?

or golfing? old clubs.

well well.. today was great!
my first day of skl for this week.
i felt like santa in flipflops this morning.
hopped onto the bus carrying 3 presents. 2 for fad & 1 for hidayah.
i left my shoe in skl since friday. so that makes it 5 days in school without me.
saw syarmeen in the bus but only noticed her when im going down.
whoops. sorry girl.
i dont know why i was feeling so cheerful today (: yupps yupps. but i liiiiiiike.
studied in the SC rm with isk durg free period.
& for PW, im so proud of my grp!
we're nearly done with WR guys!
just a liiiiitle bit more.
oooh & baby fed me with pizzas after school
yum yumm.
& the pizza made us bonkers.
both of us were plugged into his zen & we were communicating like mutes.
it was so funny that i had difficulty stiffling my giggles.
so i let go some laughs & he was like..
*gasps & points at julie's mouth while mouthing "you can talk!"*
then i just did the *oh God thank you for this miracle* move.
lol.
baby, baby.
you ah.
you & your imaginary red inhaler.
pst. its actually liquid. he stuffs it in his nose when he gets breathless laughing.
LOL.
oh yah, on the way home, accidentally eavesdropped this couple's convo
(the woman's cheena & the man's angmoh)
woman: wah, carmen elektra is the FHM type of girl ah. like pamela anderson.
man: grunts
woman: eh real or not ah??
man: grunts.. huh?
woman: *rants on & on about breast implants & how carmen can easily win over pamela.*
man: *totally listening & giving insights about breasts*

disgusting.
nvm that. that's just disgusting. guess what.
its my nenek's birthday today too. (so there hidayah, uve got a 72yr old twin)
& i was forced to kiss her!
-scrubs lips & bleaches it.-
take that!
that's worst than the most disgusting thing on Earth!
using the word is an understatement even!
oh anyways...

oops late for tuition. gotta rush.

counting down the days (wadya expect? this is the 3rd time i blogged), its been many days, hours, minutes, seconds..
& time flies really fast (any faster & it'll be deemed as cliche) & its already our nineteenth!
only nineteenth, or so you may say.
but i really appreciate the things that you did for/to me. inspire/judge/cherish/cheered/angered/whatever. me.
it really made an impact in my life.
now who made you cross my path, huh young man?
thank God for letting you swerve from your right path to MY right path.
guffaws.
if not for Him, i wouldnt find you.
just imagine, the amount of friends we have in common, & in connection.
i would have known you since secondary one!
but no, God said, thou shalt be patient.
& then, 4 years later. we met.
*fast forward*
& we're still here.
breathing.
living.
& i'd also like to thank the IMF people for blasting all those lovely fireworks on our 19th.
so sweet of you busy delegates.
HAH.
ooooooh did you see the 3 SUPER HUGE FIREWORK WITH BIG RED HEARTS INNIT?!
THAT WAS PRETTY!!!
me & my big sis rushed to the 16th floor just in time to catch 10mins worth of leftover fireworks.
better than fireworks festival & national day i tell youuu.
& the fireworks lasted more than 10mins cos it was alr thumping waaay before that.
only that i thought it was thunder.



on the last note, happy 19th darling. been long. the longest. love you still hunny bunny. cheer up ok?

the 380th post.
im still on MC. still considering to meet up with him later or not.
i dont really feel ok & my cramps are killing me!
help.
i had a nightmare ytd but i cant really rmbr what was it.
all i rmbr was that i was shot dead & ran over by a cement truck.
thn it became all cartoony cos i was flat & hidayah came in with a pump & pump me up.
LOL.
okaaay. not an ideal nightmare.
but it was scary.
i feel so stuffed!
{edit}6.44pm

was reading my previous entries at random & found this really meaningful post. din know i was so thoughtful. hmmm.
oh wells, i went out with booboo junow!
ahh i miss him.
happy 19th darling!
despite me sounding a lil off (sengau) & drowsy.. he still cheered me up la.. thanks alot darls.
yey.
wanted to shop at Bugis but was running outta time.
so yeah, bought him late lunch & he sent me home.
thanks (:
HUUUGGGS.
cant give u a proper hug cos i dont wanna spread germs to you.
& i cant thank you any less.
thanks for making me feel so much better.
love you lah

cold weather + mugging + lack of hugs & warmth frm booboo + lack of good food = one sickly julie.
im unhappy
period.
was watching discovery channel (yes out of sheer boredom, need not ask) & an interesting advert caught my attention.
why are we here?
trees are here cos they provide the world with constant supply of oxygen.
little insects pollinate the plants so that they can reproduce.
tiny shrimps support huge giants like the blue whales.
water is here cos they support most living creatures on earth.
but what are we here for?
is it possible that the Earth can still live without us?

i think its really possible.
cos just imagine a world without us, humans.
humans only cause the world to grow old & sick.
true?
we pollute.
we consume.
we destroy.
we repeat.
basically, how many of us out there actually count how many trees had been cut down when we're reading the daily papers?
none.
how many of us actually care how much pollutants we produce daily out of just surviving each day? (READ: transportation)
*rambles on & on about being nice to Mother Earth & being globally-active*


get the drift?
nature dont need us.
we're just dirtbags.
we ought to be incinerated.
eh no, that would cause too much pollution.
we ought to be.... hmmm banished magically, perhaps. *kapooof!*

RADIN TRI ISKANDAR!
i am craving for satay & lasagne!
bring me out to eat quick.
or else i'll pinch your breasts til theyre swollen.
behold!
the mighty pincher/puncher/whatever.
i love my new boxers.
doncha?
GAAAAAH. medicine make drowsy me. no me no drowsy but me wanna dance dance my kooties...
*faints*
what a dramatic way to end a senseless, purely out of boredom & random entry.
that's why, schools still existed.
they make students sane.
insane students like me, ought to be sentenced to death.
or whatever you want.
i dont know what im talking abt anymore!
asfdjh;kweqpna;ljasl@$!@#^@$!!
wheee!

the week ended really horribly.
i have no time for myself.
seriously.
im forgetting everything that's important.
bummer.
oh wells. went out early morning (like7am?) to go to Jln Kayu to get bfast with darls.
but when we're abt to go off, a girl came & hugged isk.
.............. i was.... speechless.
cos it was hasyah.
haha.
we mugged after that & went chompchomp.
but ended up at CP to eat.
right now, im having a major headache &
argh. i just lost my appetite.
called my gynae junow.
but the nurse said its not with the problem.
so i hafta make more calls tmr.
worse come to worse i hafta go A&E to get blood drawn & urine bottled again.
gaah.

thanks for that "enlightening" talk junow baby.
& thanks for loving me.
thanks for everything.
i love you.
alot.

_________________
{edit}
everyone's reciting doas & kenduri-ing & im here sneezing my nose off.
throats feeling all sore & funny.
woah.
oh anyways, i havent study for my madrasah exam yet.
3more hours to mug.
awwrghh.. i feel sick.
{/edit}

well, to top things up, i just displayed to the public a classic case of myopia.
the girl stands up & flagged the 107 bus. but when the bus came near, she watched in horror as the big numbers flashed infront of her face.
197.
-___-"
i do not know how i covered my sheer embarrassment.
BUT I WAS DAMN EMBARRASSED OKAAAAAAY!
i just wish that the ground will just open up & swallow me up.
went bugis with hid, rach & raudah.
but i ended up window shopping with hidayah.
bought quite some stuff lah.
thn went study with hidayah & introduced her to pop-central.
she never stepped into the national library lah!
unbelieveable.
& we heard a crazy man shouting GO GO GO GO GO GO GOOOOOO!
lol.

ducky wacky!

that secret waffle. FOR GIRLS ONLY.


"your jokes are a a little bit more interesting thn watching the grass on the double decker bus grow" --edwin xiaodi.

alright im fucking busy now.
i only took 2 mins to type all these. very efficient!

this is zahid. he's 2 years old. & he sucks the lolli the other way round.

busy men when it comes to food. dad looks really old here.


this is zaki. zahid's brother. he doesnt like getting kissed by me. oh, the horror!

"NO KAKAK TALL! once is enough!"

there's alot of photos to put up. but i'll keep it to these angels.
i really miss running around with them.. so naughty yet clever now.
papa worm!!!
lol. cuteness!
so bbq is bbq. fun is fun. interaction is interaction.

was feeling so angry with myself cos i din wake up to study. so i wasted 5 hours of possible mugging time. GAHH. so woke up for subuh & did some work. but ive got my sunday exams & i havent study for it. i'll be sitting for both papers in.... less than 3 hours time. argh. great.
will be having a BBQ later so everyone's coming over. & my parents din have the initiative to even tell me there's gna be a family function. hmmf. so my studying plan is well ruined.
anyways, was chatting with kelly junnow & this was what happened.

kellynormousaurus (r) says:
wah! dont wanna lose out in the turtle fad isit?
kellynormousaurus (r) says:
must put real photo of ur stooopid terrapin who chucked pizza!
kellynormousaurus (r) says:
lololololollll
kellynormousaurus (r) says:
fine! i dont wanna lose out also!
*changes dp to a crocodile*
kellynormousaurus (r) says:
mine more fierce lor! wanna challenge not?
`* [juliee ] - ♥ - says:
....

yesterday ended with a major turnoff!
was sooo pissed. nyeh.
but i found out sth that made me preeeeety happy.... shhhhhhhh.


my delicious potato salad!
here's how you make it:
you'll nd;
3 pieces of salad or cabbage or whatever greens lah, torn
1/2 tomato, wedged
abit of carrot, julianed
half a shallot, diced.
for the potato part, boil 2 roughly chopped potatoes into water with 1/4 chicken stock
then drain once cooked.
let it cool, add 2 spatula-full of mayo
sprinkle abit of sugar, salt & pepper to taste
mixed all together with the onion & scoop it onto the veggies prepared earlier
as garnish & extra flavourings, chop ham & sprinkle on top.
& viola! your potato salad is done!
serves 2.
______________________________
i got bored so i had 10mins of aromatherapy.
silk satin musk.
oooooooooh lalaaa..


sources of relaxation. the cactus. the candle. the girl.

wednesday:
mugged a total of 14hours for the whole day!!!
lucky tuition was slack. but it ended 1045pm!
so i took a day off the next day.
went MP to study.
but was tad too late so the whole place was practically full with heavy muggers for O lvl social studies.
i sat at the table area for kids. & felt awefully awkward cos im like a giant sitting in a small chair. grunts. yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, assholes.
i met 2 new little friends, lyn & luke.
so adorable. they're so clever. they were quarelling with their mummy & their mom just made that fucked up face & luke was feeling so guilty he was like "mummy are u angry? im really sorry for being selfless just now. i love you mummy" & he's like what, 4,5 years old? his big sister is an angel! she was complaining while doing her music homework & she was like telling her mom, " i hate you for forcing me to go through all these. this is such a bore! can i read books now?"
& guess what? i was alone then but luke made me feel so welcomed & warm.
he even gave me a hug to say goodbye! simply adorable.
but the thing is, their mom looked ABIT like stephanie wong.
-____-"
forget about that last part.
baby bought me dinner after that.
he wasnt with me the whole day when i was busy mugging alone.
so sweet.

thursday:
woke up feeling like a stone. my body felt so heavy.
had a date with baby to catch devil wears prada.
nice movie & i din know that baby understood the real meaning behind the movie... about career-minded women. i see the movie as it is... fashion, the typical geeky intellectual getting the killer job & turning into a hot chick & of course, there's cruella.
BAH.
& doing online thingamajiks are really killing me.
& baby, i think you're feeling sucky because you keep on having nightmares about jack. its ok, im not gonna do that ok. i wont neglect you.
i just dont understand...
talked to him til 2.


studied abit but was too tired.



friday:
went to starbucks to do our pw but alvin's stupid laptop cant tap their wireless connection. so we downgraded to noisy mcd. bleh. met booboo aft tt to eat at magic wok. & did our own stuffs & work. im so tired now. just submitted my assignment online. & everyone submitted on qn 3. i submitted all. BAH. im too tired to think already. i really nd some brain booster.
& my make-up remover ran out. just when i need it. great. anyone knows any DIY make up remover recipes?

gays always wear matching clothes.

hidayahh!!! this reminds me of what mr raj said. lols. kidding girl.

saturday

moma's sick today. so i made potato salad for her! it was yummy okaaaay. i'll make it again on monday. thanks to peiqi for inspiring me with the potato salad from starbucks. heee. brought some potato salad for booboo & studied with him for awhile at ptp mcds. & rose's sis came over to meet up so that i can pass her rose's homework. ROSMAINY!! YOU SISTER LOOK JUST LIKE YOU! so cute.

so off we hopped into the bus to UNISIM's openhouse. the courses are catered to ADULTS. 21 yrs & above. so you can start imagining who turn up for it. but the courses are interesting. the carnival was an eyeopener. i dont know what made my eyes open but yeah, nvm. my blog looks distorted with firefox. wonder why. but it looks okay with IE right? i think so.

i blogged. but i suddenly lost my mood & everything just crumbled down. so i deleted that happy post. sometimes i just wished that i was born a little bit more clever so that i dont hafta put in that 96231481623% more into hardwork. im so tried of mugging already. & the threat of getting kicked out of school no longer scares me. i even thought of alternatives beyond this year. where did all my courage go? oh God. i feel so mentally weak & drained beyond repleshment. i saw veron's tag & i realised how much i missed her & all my classmates. i dont think i can click back with them anymore. its like, i was the only malay girl in my class then & i was like,..... i dont know. sorta drifted. oh no... my migraines are killing me. i want the time to stop. ive been so busy sleeping these 2 days. i wasted TWO full days. im so angry with myself. & i cant stop myself from thinking so much. other than studies, im still thinking about me & him. how are we gonna survive all these. i thought i can leave my thoughts about us aside but it just kept on drifting back to me. why did i hear people telling me that we're gonna end up in marriage. not that i dont want. i just dont want to hold high hopes for this relationship. although this is much much better than jack, i cant assure marriage after just nearly 2 years of relationship. there's alot that i hafta learn about him & also myself. mr raj even ASSUME that my future job is a housewife. what the **** is that. urgh. forget it. im feeling like that pile of shit that had been rotting behind our school. so lonely & soul-less. i even woke up in the middle of the night crying for no apparent reason.maybe its because of what we talked about the other day. i thougth i wouldnt be affected. i mean, i was really okay & open about the topic. i listened to him but it just flooded me after that. i kept on thinking about it. im not being "action" about it or what. but i just felt like he really dont deserve such a girl like me. sometimes i can see tha happiness he had. the stuffs i use to read in her blog. they were so happy. i dont know!!!!!!! what the fuck are you thinking, bitch. i serously think promos are killing me. i saw all my flaws when i tried applying what i mugged for. it was basically nothing. i dont know what already went in & i cant simply regurgitate what i put in. i saw my primary school bestfriend at MP the other day & i still can remember how happy i was. she really made my day. it was a surprise to see her when i heard me FULL NAME being called in public & i was so shocked that my reflexes failed & i just stared into the mirrored doors of the lift & saw her waving. i turned & waved back &after that, i was showered with blissful memories during our primary school. we were so close. & i drifted away from her so much. the last primary skl gathering, i was so saddened by the fact that she appeared & i wanted to talk badly to her, but nothing came out. its just that, the telephone line is always engaged. we looked at each other but just simple exchange of words came out. i dont want that to happen to me again. i figured that im the worse a friend can have.
ahhhhhh... why am i being so sentimental. fuck it lah.
i need to mug til i fart.
i cant really fathom what's going on right on.
i need a warm warm hug from my girlfriends & YOU.

met booboo to go to the RSAF's openhouse. i wanna go there cos i wanna check out their scholarships offered. & also to ogle at hot birds on display. & of course, the people who flies them (eherm) hahaa. but when we reach Eunos, the queue for the free shuttle service is soooooooooo long i tell you. i immediately lost interest. the thought of standing there waiting for my turn to go on board the service. ah, forget it. we backed out & the officer approached us & asked why. we just said we're short of time. & there's actually an SBS service that goes there but you hafta pay like $1+ & these money-faced singaporeans would rather queue up for sth free. went MP to mug. manage to cover quite some.
went compass point after that to catch the Singapore Idols. we werent any of those who screams & feverently snap their cammies at the "idols". we were at the top floor & hady smiled at me (melts) oklah. he just smiled at the crowd. i just saw him smile okaaaaaaaay. hmmff..& paul is really ugly. on air & off air. stage makeup isnt gonna work for ogres like him who croaks. & not to mention, all those MAKCIKS were jumping up & down screaming hady mirza's name & hopefully to attract his attention. i really pity him. why?! what did he do to deserve all these?!
oh, crap. nvm. i was jus grossed out by the makciks. go syarahan better right? alamak.
then at compass, there's these 2 SRJC chinese girls who saw darls & immediately beamed & started giggling. siao arh? i was so mad at them. but i just glared at them until one saw & hit the other girl. really. crazy people. the singapore idol stage was behind you la. not at my boyfriend.
siao.

im so shagged.
went mugging with rose & darling this morning.
rose looked soooo sweet today.
love it.
hee..
okaaaaayy...
my house is in a mess right now.
the curtains fell off, clothes & cushions all over.
& 3 kids (didi, my niece & nephew) running berserk in the house.
ok. come to think of it, its nice seeing didi having some company.
i never had time to play with him.
but what the heck.
since when do i have time for anything other than time to waste?
anyways,
isk painted my nails for me yesterday.
not that bad la, for a guy. first time holding the nail polish applicator some more.
so funny.
but oklah. shant be evil.
after the celebrations, went to met mel, jas, ed at ps.
lulu & ahgong joined later.
we went to MINDS CAFE @ prinsep place.
damn cosy lah that place.
should check it out k?
(to fad: got cute funny ang moh leh. should check him out. the other waiters are friendly & cute too!)
& there's even this cute riddle at the door of the toilet.
(what's with the "CUTE-ness"?!)
i solved it before the previous occupant got out.
so clever right?
anws, went off early cos of my curfew.
but i had a good time playing & catching up with them.
& i won IM THE BOSS!
i earned 38million at the end of the round.
& played abit of TABOO eventho i din want to.
but i cant stop blurting out the answers.
ooops.
ooooooooooooh im gonna go gaga at RSAF's hot birds tomorrow!
anyone joining?
eh, let's go clubbing leh. im itching.