all i ask for you is to understand my situation.
being angry with you when im fasting is the last thing in my mind.
& why must you spoil my day?
all that is just a test.
i was fine & dandy thruout the day.
but!
why?!
i dont understand.
& you dont understand either.
i dont wanna collect dosa now.
but sighsigh.

the computer usage ban was lifted.
thank heavens.
went to NLB to source for articles for my EoM.
was really piling those mags lah.
& manage to catch the sunset with darls (:
"loh-mantik"
i was so frustrated when i couldnt photocopy the article cos i dont have the damn cashcard
& the lady (who tried to be helpful) told me to come back at 9pm to buy the cashcards.
am i that free to wait in the freezing library?!
urgh.
was really disappointed ok.
but oh wells, hopefully i'll find the mag again.
& seriously, its really tough to find an article regarding my grp's topic.
& no time.

baby really cheered me up (:
thanks for the kisses & the massage.
my body feels so light now..

& im sooooooo exhausted!
will someone make me a warm cup of cocoa?
im in desperate need of entertainment!

woke up with dizzy spells cos i slept a tad too much.
whoops.
but i felt so refreshed!
surprisingly my body wasnt aching at all after x country ytd.
was expecting it to be..
& i am so proud of rose!
she came in 15th leh..
& i think my team made a mistake by pushing me forward as the fastest 2 runners.
yes im fast but long-d is not my forte.
& the whole competing thing was a mistake too.
but oh wells, what's done is done.
at least i came in 24th out of 200+ competitors.
now, that's an achievement.

i was dead beat after that. ate & bumped around with the floorballers & the rest at fork&spoon for awhile..
then went off to raffles city.
i slept at starbucks for 20mins!
omg.
& darls is suppose to meet this guy or sth & i totally din realise.
i slept thru.
in public!
oh gosh.
he sent me off & i just jumped into bed & slept for 5hours.


sunset & grey skies.
was feeling a lil dull & down due to extreme exhaustion.
called kelly up & she was being so evil to me
booohooos~

the bigger the fault if you know what the consequences will be, yet you continue to move forward. Yet convinction and firm belief propel, and who then weighs heavier? opinions are different to each of his own and words with no malignant motive have spikes that can only be felt on certain skins..

sigh.

my parents just got to know my results yesterday.
& adds on to my already grounded self.
so now its 4 weeks: no computer, no tv, & no dates.
-wails-
hmm.

comments from the tutors?
mr raj said im attentive, but mom disagreed. she said im dreamy & a gd sleeper.
ms ang said im sweet & diligent. mom said i refuse to read the smelly straits times.
mr ng said im very careless & i'll fall into the drain & also a very lazy girl. mom totally agreed.
mdm siti said im too quiet & urged me to talk more in class. mom said i talk alot at home & said maybe im just too lazy to talk in skl.
(mdm siti was being very penetrative & seriously, i felt so insulted when she asked moma what time i went home everyday.)
moma: maghrib & above.
lol.
& mdm siti glared at me & asked why did i go home so late.
my problem lah.
she's not my mom for goodness sake.
so i just shrugged & pretend to be stupid.

but in a nutshell (heh..) it was a really good (subjective) reflection session for me.

i fetched moma & had a quick nap. (i think i slept more than 13hours already) reached school & bumped into isk & his mom.
it was a big OOOPS.
& moms met & eyes met & oooops.
so embarrassing!
we went in the class together & mr raj was like
WAAAHH! GOOD GOOD! SIT SIT!
-faints-
while waiting moma whispered;
moma: how well did your boyfriend do?
me: dont know
moma: did he score better than you?
me: yeah.

but dont think our moms can clique well.
i can sense that moma's jealous.
HEHH.
oh wells then, see you tiny butters in 4 weeks!


ps. i wanna sprain my ankle too~ why do i hafta compete?

things to do by tonight:

• PW
• bahas
• mgt research
• script
• heave two 500+ pages worth of books to skl tmr
• sleeeeeep
• & coffee for tmr
• eat dinner

morning started off weirdly with moma willingly asking what i wanna bring for school.
so i said, fried rice.
& she whipped out the best fried rice ever.
thanks moma (:
although its not a typical start for me.
& it happens that its not Mr Wisdom whose creating hell for me.
its my JAW~
god knows what did i do with my jaw.
i remember trying to bite my little brother's butt off last time...
but that shouldnt be the cause of this pain.

& the horny male cats are creating sucha fuss with my baby girl!
she seems to be enjoying the attention tho...
if they dare rape my baby, i'll chop their balls off & stuff cheese in them
& roast em til its crispy & cheese oozing out.
YUM!

on the whole, the musical production is going on well.
the class as usual, alot of potential & hidden divas.
(READ: _RUBERAJ)
guffaws.
but improvisation will definitely make it look superb.
& a note of whine: maths is making my brain dysfunctional!

i was feeling so bleak & beyond tardiness & sluggish.
i thought i'll be pushed leniently up to at least an AO.
but no.
im still stuck with FUCK.
while hidayah got an AO.
not fair.

was watching [& listening to] like a gazillion podcasts [on youtube & mr brown] to kill boredom & melancholia
when suddenly my wisdom tooth created hell for me.
its really throbbing like fuck! ok nvm. just feeling fuck-ish. my report card should be burnt in Senoko to generate power. better than bringing it home & generate fury in my parents, it'll do the nation good by providing them with power.
trouble

dad was very unreasonable to me today.
i was pretty much pissed with him til now.
did self study & went for sunday school.
for the first time, i felt that little beat of confidence while on the way to sunday school.
i never liked sunday schools.
but i never fail to fall asleep too.
& the first time since eons ago that i caught the drift of the lessons of the day
surprisingly.
about marriage & divorce.
made me think about my relationship.

went out to do my tutorials but i stupidly forgot to bring my qn paper.
grunts.
i heaved both 2684912tonne books all the way there for nothing!
grunts somemore.
so did self revision instead.
ate dinner & went off to amk.
i miss that place.
bustling yet comfy.
been reading malay stuffs recently.
i think due to my depression on my screwed malay oral.
which is too late but my mind refuse to give in.
hmff..
its no use lah julie.

im feeling so pissy & fucky.
i think i'll wear my favourite PJs to bed tonight.
& there's school tmr!

& thanks for the compliments people! blush.
[flat tummy & sweet display pic]
rezinna [i think that's how you spell your name] asked how did i get such flat tummy
& i said, i eat.
& she cackled.
so cute.
she was the one who claimed that the gravity of the toilet is much stronger than other places cos things kept on falling. hahaa!

this was a spoiler for raudah! haha (:

mr talk-alot & his 2 angels [one who burps aloud & another who quarrels alot]

the merepek choochoo train! look at agnes!

so sweet la.

GIRL LOVE!

i love this photo. so sweet. me i mean. heeee.

kelihatan achi-achi di negeri india yang dilanda bencana alam tsunami baru baru ini. mereka datang ke sekolah kami untuk meminta sedekah. LOL.

achi & mr lo. happy last day!

:)

agnes love

vice prez & mr prez

that's the name of Mo's adorable hamster.
booboo..
i miss him.

school ended so bloody early.
like 1245?!
all thanks to those taking their A's chinese listening compre.
actually that's quite mean la.
taking other's sufferings at my own expense.
but OH WELL.
thanks anyways.
i managed to squeeze some time to visit my sickly boyfriend & cook lunch for him.
poor boy.
bought SUGAR ROLLS TOO!!!
yumm yumm.

& my marks.
(looks down in shame)
a B4 for malay. badly done for the giveaway 20marks peribahasa.
(WARGH! pulls hair)
C6 for GP.
so far an Alevel pass for management.
that's paper 1 only.
so let's hope for the better for paper 2.
i wanna secure an Alevel pass for my cert.
Maths, so far i failed.
16.5/35
hoping for the better still...

SUNDAY:
baybeats was awesome lah.
concave scream's moshpit was filled in less than 5mins.
wanted to mosh with baby but we decided the best of it.
i wanted to mosh badly tho.
-sulks-
electrico, ETC, lunarin & page!!
-screams-


some jokes to share i found while blog hopping.
what happens when u put a bomb in your underpants?
you get a banana split.
what happens when u put a bomb inside someone's bra?
tit-bits.

in OUR private room with mr alien & mr dragon strangling mr stupid-face.

flappin' my arms to keep myself afloat so that i can walk on water.

he looks like he's wearing heely's & gliding on water. LOL.

mommy look! im sitting on a giant furry cheeseball!

-beams-
my room is cleaned.
spent the whole day cleaning up.
okla.
i admit, its still messy. abit.
but as compared to this,

i think its much better now.
grunts.

girlies (:

was still feelin cold frm the exam room

long time ago photo. lol. mugger. notice the amt of chocolates & coffee i consumed.

see, told you mugging was a bore

girls

rury facing off with MJ

rose

oh, that's vitz (points to the flash of white)

slumped home with a light heart & watched Silent Hill.
damn gory please.

i had an awesomely great day with booooby.
heee. suppose to mug for tmr's maths la.
but procrastination prevails.
-evil cackle-
got carried away with frying nuggets & learning computer stuffs
& not forgetting,
SIMS 2 UNIVERSITY.
yey! he got the expansion pack & it rocks lah.
my sims gave birth to a smelly baby girl.
& the baby stinks really.
i think i'll let her grow into a slut.
cos her dad's gay
& her mom's wants is to woohoo with 3 different sims.
what sick family.

fun aside.
i have this sudden urge to grow like a friggin hugeass person...
REALLY REALLY HUGE, SO I CAN STAND ON SOME STARS, WEAR A HUMONGOUS PEASANT SKIRT, & FLOP THE SKIRT RIGHT OVER EARTH!
heehee (:
ohhhhhhh, that be giving scary visual images.
skirts skirts SKIRTS! wear skirts on head! head!
GAH!
i hate maths.
A level maths sucks.

& i wanna buy more bras.

i cant wait til exams are over.
why?
movie marathon at my place anyone?
any takers?
i was flippin thru dvds & i saw:
; over the hedge
; silent hill
; superman returns
; xmen 3

& erm many more.
but i wanna watch these 4!
anyone has scary movie 4?

& BAYBEATS!! friday saturday sunday!!!
runs around in bed room slippers with a banana stuck in the mouth
omg excitement kills me.

beach.
studied there.
t'was windy & nice.
& the cat visited me.
that cat that got very comfy ard us last time.
it was there. so i carried it onto the table.
it was just minding its own business & i carried on studying.
at least i wasnt alone.
but it got kinda dark & the table i was sitting at has no lamp-posts nearby.
so i went to the rocky place & just sat there admiring the sea.
it was high tide & i let the waves lap onto my feet.
warmth.
& i forgot about the time.
so rushed home for dinner.
pasta.
kelly sent me a dance routine & i dance.
for 15mins only.
i got so tired.
& one of the songs was from Honey!!
omg love that movie.

splurging. i think that's the best way to forget my misery.
to hell the day went.
& so deemed paradoxical; "its much tiring being happy than being depressed"
checked my mails & i nearly got a heart attack.
1283 mails.
faints.
right, im blasting headlong into Over My Head & Diary of Jane
& singing like a maniac to many other songs.
my only company...
i dont know what happened to him.
all the more i should check on him.
but im not.
he was nice to me today.
he got me a Spongebob Squarepants figure.
melts.
i love you.
dont pamper me too much ok?

i felt so silly.
its like ive been thinkin alot lately.
too much i think.
i stared a whole 15mins on the ceiling until my glowing stars became dark.
& i still cant sleep.
but the thing is, i dont know what im thinkin..
studies?
future?
life?
relationship?
i have no idea.
i'll just fall into a daze & just look far & just get lost.
it's so not me.

i should be tired now.
cos went out so early in the morning (well, i was 20mins late & he hadta come over to fetch me) to meet isk to go for a swim.
& i suddenly felt so scared in the pool.
even after swimming around for quite some time.
when isk was at the other side & i was suppose to swim over, i suddenly felt so scared of the depth.
its weird.
& i was even daydreaming (well not exactly DAYDREAMING but along that line.) while drying my hair in the showers after that.
i just stared into the mirror & looked beyond.
i dont know.
these things i cannot fathom.
they're bugging me.
& i just dont know how to shoo them away.
shooo! you fucking annoying things.
studied after that.
had coffee.
maybe that's why.
my mind needs rest.
should stop drinkin those caffein.

on a much lighter note, i managed to catch alot of dates with Mr Tv today.
smallville, that's so raven, drake & josh, ghost whisperer, desperate housewives, along came poly.
that's ALOT.
to compensate for my loss of entertainment.
oh dear.
i even managed to find time to do my nails, my hair, put on a facial mask & had some of those yummy Godiva chocolates dad bought.

& i got tied into my emotions.
i teared after watching ghost whisperer.
i got too connected to that show.
stupid.

& oh,

my essay is doomed.
now i know whatever i studied din go into my fucking head.
urgh`
shant rant about it. what's over is over.
i'll just study harder for the next papers.
-prays feverently-
oh wells, headed to town after the paper with isk.
din know what to do cos it was pretty early. like 11?!
so yeah, ate at cahaya & i had my hotplate; scrumptious.
& i asked for extra gravy & they gave me flooded hotplate.
HAH.
but its still yummy nonetheless.
window shopped & i saw MANY NICE TOPS!
& there was an abercrombie & fitch sale & i saw this super nice bottom that ive been looking for since eons ago!!
(rants on & on about how nice it was & how she should be saving up instead of blowing on materials)
then isk thought it would be fair (i think he thought that it would be fair) that we go over to Sim Lim Square to window shop for "guy's" stuffs.
humf.
so yeah. from town. to simlim.
was okla. we hadta walk quite a distance there. good exercise. & i laughed alot.
oggled at those advance technical gadgets & ease my itchy fingers on the buttons i could lay on & we went off.
he taught me a lil about computers (cos i know nuts about them, serious!)
& i had my chocolate dose.
we stumbled across Tekka Mall & went in for a look.
pretty oklah.
not so "dark" as i pressumed it'd be.
cheap bargains too.
& we saw this:
1. SRS CONSTRUCTION COMPANY (serangoon secondary?!?!!)
2. SERANGOON Airways
haha.
then i brought him over to my old primary school (it's now demolished, long lived BWPS). there's a playground in the private estate & we played the swing!
so fun omg. my skirt was flying all over the place & i tried to make him dizzy by twisting him round & round & round the swing & let him untwist (:
then we played the seesaw. my bum kept on going "thump thump" on the seat lah. cos i was literally flown up & pushed back down by unknown force.
hahaa. it's just his weight.

he was really good today. he carried my tote most of the time today (:
love you.
i wanna play the swing with you again (:
i had fun!
lost track of time & so i din head over to NTU to catch the first game. boos.

i shouldnt be too complacent.
management paper 1 was alright.
do-able i guess.
i shouldnt be too complacent.
2 down, many more to go.
supporting MI floorball in Adivs tmr.
all the best Rose!
better start mugging for Econs.
i shouldnt be too complacent.

acks. taking a breather from econs.
it's really killing my brain cells.
like since forever.

& ever.



& still is. *dies*
BAH.
i only studied for 2hours & im taking a 15min break for myself.
& i havent revised on elasticity concepts.
i havent even finish on labour market!
& the 2hrs is merely spent on placidly jotting notes.
i havent started on my mind maps yet!
oh my.
time is running short.
rly shrt.
wargh~
i cant wait til everything's over.
the anxiety is killing me!
seems that everything's killin me yes?
hahaha..
shall diligently get back to my work.
i think i'll need my mocha tmr again (:

i had/i did/ i felt/ for today ...

• major migraines
• a problematic knee
• prayed with moma
• have girly talk with moma
• hugged dad
• sleepy head

summarising the day: major bummer

lesson of the day: dont talk to strangers. din your moma always tell ya? they're bad. bad bad people. (oral sucks anyways. shant rant about senseless issues. regret is regret. there's no happiness in regret. BAH!)

happy thoughts #1: sharing stomach aches with girlfriends make me feel whole. LOL.

happy thoughts #2: given a peck when asleep & receiving all the attention in the world. -malicious smile-

happy thoughts #3: playing with spongebob & his magic cornshell is good entertainment.

happy thoughts #4: eeyore is still cuter than spongebob but cookie monster still rock. but who can ever beat patrick star? he's the man -burp-

happy thought #5: music therapy works like nobody's business.

note to self: better get your ass off the chair & start mugging last minute for management!!! & eat your KFC later. before them hungry heads finish it off. paper starts at 12 tmr. can sleep late. coffee=migraines. so strictly no coffee. hot cocoa is welcomed.

everyone seems missing. hmmmmm...
& it seems tt im the only one feverently blogging every bit of my life.
BAH.
what life?
i have no friggin life!
& when boredom gets the better of me, my notes suffer. my lil notebook is torn & dog-eared now. i need to bind it. fast!
random.
been having major migraines recently.
shant talk abt the after-effects of overdose.
it was bad.
i thought i was dead cos i can hear voices in my head clearly.
i broke up in sweat & my whole body was limp, i tell ya. it was scary. its like, im in comatose.
& that was 5 panadol extras.
& that wasnt the after-effects mind you.
ok, my mind's in a mess now.
mugging for 6 hours straight is so not fun.
my back is killing me.
my brain is failing me.
i need my dosage of SANENESS!
i demand for a break!!! (which i am doing right now so it makes no difference)
im in need to lose weight & save up & pay back my fastings by this month.
this month.
cos i think 50kilo mark is erm. too much for me.
see all these flabs? (pokes tummy). yeah, these have gots to go. see these? (flaps arms) this one's gotta toughen up. & noone can ever miss these (points at tighs) more go, the rest toughen up.
so after mids will get back into shape.
finish up my medications, check up, get discharged asap, & i'll be as healthy as a chick!
i hope.
i know... (rolls eyes) action speaks louder than words...
we'll see about that huh Mr Incredible?
let the Queen of Procrastination show you how its done.

my messy clutter #1














my adorable baby..















messy clutter #2















honey stars! i love it. my ultimate energy booster for the day!

i looked retarded & shagged in both snaps. oh dear. went to mug over at hidayah's after school ytd but girls will be girls. we eat, talk, laugh, take pictures & do everything else except getting to work. notice the advert above. lol. we're like promoting Famous Amos' cookies. cookie monstresses! yeah, we aint no monster. we just brushed thru some stuffs & watched Holland V & cartoons & more tv. fad cldnt study cos she lost her black marker. BAH! & hidayah let us watch this "fuck you" music video which is so crude cos its in indonesian & this spiritual documentary which i din fall for. cos they look like masks lah. hmmff. so im not scared. besides, my loverboy came over to her place to fetch me home. so im safe. hee..

i drank more mocha & i revised quite a sum ytd. & i cldnt sleep. so tt explains all the quizes in my previous post. yeah.. i only got to sleep at 5am & woke up at 530am.
i was doubling over cos of super bad cramps. as usual, mr raj called. so yey. i stayed home. & happens that isk din go to school too! bad boy!
i finally fell into the chatting mood. not the right time hoh. replied quite alot of IMs. i usually ignore them. sorry ppl.

here's what ahgong IMmed me.

soonweizhitheaverageguy[Anima Sana In Corpore Sano] says:
nolah.. no time fer new scandals.. one good old one is enuf..
soonweizhitheaverageguy[Anima Sana In Corpore Sano] says:
and tt's u!!hahahha!!!
`* [juliee] - • mugging ♡ • says:
yeah!! i must be your only scandal k
`* [juliee] - • mugging ♡ • says:
if not im not special already
soonweizhitheaverageguy[Anima Sana In Corpore Sano] says:
ok!!!

& then there's kelly.
kelly woo bee kang trong seng says:
fucking hell you menses girl
kelly woo bee kang trong seng says:
u haf cramps n happily skipped sch..tsk, watta bitch
`* [juliee] - • mugging ♡ • says:
dno how to say hello is it

& then there's also andrew. sigh. that boy.
this night is mine! says:
i nvr knew u r in my list hahahahaha
this night is mine! says:
everytime i msn u, u nvr reply den tonite i feel so weird lidat cos u replied

& my lovely simone
smxne says:
porky pig! missyoumissyoumissyoumissyoumissyoumissyou!
`* [juliee] - • mugging ♡ • says:
(:

& many other insignificant other chats.
i think i wanna go for a jog ltr.

& to think im blogging at this unholy hour of the day! too much coffee.. blame it all on the amount of chocolates & coffee i consumed. im definitely gonna die of lack of sleep. oh wells, just done talking on the phone with isk. been SOOO long since we talked from night to morning. the longest ever phonecall was with him when i just got to know him. & we talked like we were childhood pals. 8hours! we talked, dozed off, woke up, talk again. HAHAHA. that was fun. but ytd's session was merely gossipping & reminiscing & thinking back about how foolish, funny & touching life could be.. we were so open. for once, i thought i was gonna die of jealousy when he talked abt clara. but i din (: & i talked abt jack & all. it was an instant that i truely understood him. isk, that is. it was bliss. see, gossipping has its therapeutic effects.